Only the good die young

Friday night, I picked Kiara and her friend Jermaine up from the day care. As I started to prepare dinner I got a phone call from Riekje, one of my co-workers at Advisie. We have a small dinner club and even though 3 of us have moved on to other jobs we still meet at least once a year to have dinner together and sometimes an activity is part of our being together.
I thought Riekje was calling to ask how I was but she told me she had bad news. Our friend Irene Misset, who had also been one of our gang, had suddenly passed away. I was in total shock and I could tell that Riekje had a very hard time telling me. (Death being a real taboo when people talk to me). I was grateful for the courage which Riekje was able to find to tell me. Of course I promised to be at the cremation on Monday.

Well, I only just made it in time as the internet route was not precisely clear. Being sick makes you see a situation like this from a totally different perspective. I shouldn't elaborate on the details as they are really quite upsetting. Anyway, somehow or other I was once again faced with the reality that we must all seize the day as tomorrow may never come. Such clichés when you think about it...but if you stop to really think about them they are probably life's most important lessons.

Irene was only 52 and died of a heart attack. The day before she had worked late and was coaxed to go home by one of her co-workers. What a gift...those extra precious minutes at home! Only a few weeks ago Irene had sent me an e-mail to send me her support. I hadn't even gotten around to responding before I heard her news. That feels awful. Irene still had so many plans. I remember that the last time she was here she was mentioning that she would have liked to travel more but didn't have the guts. I guess that was not on her menu.

The last two weeks I have tried to think about the downside of my illness and trying to get all my paperwork done etc. I have had to face my mortality. I don't like to think of death too much...but the paperwork still needs to get done. I think I should get it all behind me...so I can go back to thinking about life.

I have a huge bump on my head that feels like there is some liquid inside. I think my treatment is working. Frankly...every extra pain I feel boosts my optimism. I do hope I am not one of the "good".

When I told Kiara that Aisha means life she said that made sense:
"No illness can get my mommy down"!