Baby K cries

Kiara is home! She was excited to see me, happy that the 10 days had passed. She hugged me profusely. I was happy she was no longer scared to be near me. Almost immediately, she asked me if the cure had worked. I told her I did not know for sure yet because the doctor had to look at it first.
She could see that I am much more mobile than before and assured me that it had to be working because I was able to do things I wasn't able to before. I believe she was convincing herself. I got the impression she thought it was all over, so I had to break the news that there will be at least two more operations. It did not seem to bother her, I suppose she does not know what that implies.

We had dinner and she showered and washed her hair. When I dried her hair she watched television. Afterwards I let her sleep in my bed. She asked me to join her and that was when she began firing questions at me. I tried to answer them as well as I could. Then at one point she became upset. She started to cry hysterically. I asked her why she was crying...she said that the cancer was such a scary disease because you can't tell if you have it from the outside. She was suddenly not so sure if I would beat the cancer and from there on I was unable to console her. I told her it was OK to cry and held her closely. I tried to explain to her that her mother was fighting really hard. She told me I was unable to fight. Of course in her eyes all I am is a physical wreck. Eventually she moved away and asked me to get someone else to come over. It was 23.00 pm so I did not know how to arrange that. We phoned my mother instead, who read short stories to her, long distance. It helped. Kiara went to sleep at 23.40.
I am starting to get used to dealing with these outbursts. After all, don't we all cry? Don't we all get angry and scared? Kiara is a healthy girl dealing with a terrible ordeal. Luckily she is able to express her feelings. Her adult approach is what scares me.
I am so happy the school is cutting her some slack. This morning she slept in and went to school at 09.30 instead.

My mother's dear friend Carola said: "Bone-marrow is like children. It is much tougher than we think". It seems like children are like bone-marrow...