The cancer or me?

So, I've been a little out of touch the past two weeks. Rehab continues. I didn't know what I was setting myself up for when I prolonged my stay.
As you already know, I started my Sorafenib cure. It is extremely tough. As usual my reaction to the medication is way over the top. Here's what's happening to my body:

• The first 10 days I had diarrhea which led to an 8 pound (4 kilo) weight loss.
• The there's the hair loss
• A major loss of energy
• Hand and foot syndrome
• Tumor pain
• I have a rash all over my body
• Mysteriously, my menopause seems to have been reversed.

  

  All of which are alarming. I am keeping my doctor (Dr. vd Eertwegh, Oncologist) busy with worried calls, and I also saw him last Friday. He seems pleased with my progression. Pain=Gain with this drug, so we are hopeful.

His advice is stick with the programme.

Sticking with the programme is proving to be a real problem for me. Trying to combine this with rehab is almost impossible.

The side effect of my treatment are keeping me from sleeping. And yesterday the pain and itch was so bad that I decided to take a break today.

They say that if you stick to the poison long enough your body adjusts. I bet they never tried it! It is particularily difficult doing these as there was no acute reason to start this. However, this drug might give me back my future, who knows. I don't have much to go by, and I am trying to find out how other people within a range of 35- 45 do. This led to me contacting Dr. Marcia Brose of the Abramson Cancer Center at the University of Pennsylvania who led the first trials on Thyroid cancer. Ms. Brose gave me a rapid response, but I seem to be ahead of the business.

She was able to tell me about taking little breaks when the side effects get unbearable. I suppose my hunch was right. We will see how it goes. For now, I seem to be stuck at the bottom of the valley. This is one of the hardest battles so far.

One more thing that I really have to get off my chest: Bayer has a monopoly with this drug. They have their own farmacy which provides the pills, with suplementary nurses who visit your home to inform you about the drug. The price for 112 tablets is a shocking 3768,90 euro's. And my own farmacy cannot order it! I refused the nurse. I wish I could have refused the pills.

"Ohh you want to talk around them, talk about me, talk about what this that and everything Every way I been f***in you but you don't have a clue How while you sit there pointin' fingers at, imagine that, I'm the real vision of the person that you want to be It's never been you it's always been me

Isn't it funny? When every money's What you're trippin' over, leaving a paper trail ".

Tantric, Monopoly