A normal life resumes?

Lately, the sign of the time has been about picking up my life again. Having the ability to have a social life again, starting to go back to work, looking after Kiara again and being in a relationship again, are all signs that my horizon has broadened enough to even contemplate a future. It is at this time that sadness and fears are on the surface, yet at the same time my road to the future is manifested.

Things like taking Kiara to the optician, or the dentist, or having her friends over are almost normal again. But her tears at night when she goes to bed are a constant reminder that I am not quite there yet. Living with cancer is OK really, if the sadness and fear are only your own. It is the pain that your loved ones have that is killing. On the other hand, it feels right to have an open dialog, so that I do not have to wonder what is going on.

My own fear is based on the fact that the last treatment did not have the anticipated result. I feel pains and discomforts which I did not feel before. At the same time, my orthopedic recovery has been phenominal. When you have cancer, every ache or soar could be a potential tumor. I have not seen the specialists since the beginning of December and I seem to have lost the confidence I had before. Today I go back to Lips to evaluate my state.

The fact that I worry, is worrying to me.